Tuesday, November 30, 2010

Putting the Christ back in Christmas and other culturally insensitive holiday sayings...

I was raised in an atheist/Buddhist household. My father has long been a meditator and my mother well...she always said "I am a spiritual person with a deep faith but I don't think there is some guy in the clouds deciding my fate and I certainly don't need anyone down here telling me how to live my life". My mother believed in the power of new life. As a long-time midwife she believed very much in higher powers. Anyway, this is not about my parents religious inclinations. As I was saying I was raised in an organized religion free household. The one caveat was Christmas. My Mother LOVES Christmas. She loves the traditions and the lights, the zillion piece jig-saw puzzles, the tree in the corner, visiting family and above all the music at midnight mass. I went to church almost every Christmas as a kid just so we could sing in the most amazing acoustics once a year. Christmas was a big deal in our household. My Father had a Santa suit and every year for many many years, my mother and I would buy books for my cousins, wrap them in brown paper and hand pain winter scenes or lovely designs. My father would dress up and dust off his best, most convincing ho-ho-ho and we would put on a show of Santa coming to my aunt's house to ask all the little cousins what they wanted for Christmas. It was a full scale production. It was magic.

It was my Mother's favorite time of the year. It was mine to for a long time just because my Mother was always so energized and enthusiastic. I loved the art projects and the time spent shopping for the books. The books were a tradition started when I was an infant by my aunt Margaret. Every birthday and Christmas she would send me some beautiful book that always seemed absolutely perfect for my personality and developmental stage. She lived 9 hours away and we hardly ever saw her in person but she was uncanny in her ability to send me a "new favorite" book EVERY TIME. In fact I still have most of them today. I have read them to the dozens of children I have cared for over the years and I will give them to my own children some day.

Christmas was always a very thoughtful time of year. As an older child I didn't love it as much as Thanksgiving because it always seemed to come with this added buzz of money worry and too many other obligations. But as a child, Christmas did seem magical.

As an adult, I have worked Christmas eve and day for the last 6 years. The particular day doesn't mean an awful lot to me and I know how much it means to many people and their families. Someone has to be at work in the emergency department on Christmas so it might as well be me. My husband feels the same way about there being someone in the ambulance and thus, we try to pick up the holiday shifts and our family (his is here in Oregon) has learned to roll with the punches and celebrate Christmachaunuka on whatever day we can all have off together somewhere in the week surrounding actual Christmas. I don't work holidays to get the praise or to use it as a bargaining chip in future vacation requests. I do it because as a kid there were lots of holidays that my mom spent on-call or in a delivery at the hospital and I was one bummed out six-year old to have to wait or have presents on the next morning. I get how hard it can be for the family of the shift workers. I do it because I can and it doesn't ruffle too many feathers any more. I do it because it makes my heart feel good to know that I made the holidays a little easier and brighter for someone else's family and that when folk show up in the ED they are going to be cared for by at least one person who wants to be there on that day.

So, all of this is leading up to a little rant about sayings like "Tough crap if I offend anyone by saying Merry Christmas! It's not Happy Holidays! Its Christmas so too bad!" Its this sort of militant "Christmas" beating that drives me bonkers. "Christ is the reason for the season. I'm only going to say Merry Christmas and if that offends anyone they can shut up" ** I am NOT kidding you people! Facebook status** "They can shut up? How very Christian of you! How super tolerant and loving of you. The attitude of "Jesus died for all our sins so I'm gonna punch you if you don't agree" seems rather profoundly UNChristian to me. If I did believe in Jesus or God I think I would believe that he was a loving and tolerant one. I think I would believe he truly wanted us to love and cherish one another and not just the oneanothers who agree with each other. ALL the oneanothers. I have a lot of trouble with people who hate other people in the name of God. If God is so all powerful he can hate whoever he wants without my help. I think the Godly thing to do however, is to see the beauty in our differences and to appreciate the richness of the world. My Mother ALWAYS said it but it is true..."How boring would the world be if we were all alike?"

SO, my challenge to the world this Christmas/Holiday season is to actually practice being like the spirit you worship or believe in. I have heard the quote "For God so loved the world that he gave his only son..." He loved the WORLD. The whole world. Not just the Christian world. He loved all of the rest of us as well. I am not asking anyone to give their children to be crucified....I am simply asking us to practice that kind of love in the many small ways we are able. Take a breath and step aside from how angry political correctness makes you and think about it on a more personal level. Acting, giving and even speaking "Merry Christmas" out of love and genuine love will always be a good thing to do. But the same cannot be said for beating someone up with your faith.

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